I just finished reading an excellent piece in the NYT on the current overall state of marriage.  I'm also currently trying to finish this post as my wife would like me to get off the computer and spend time with her!

The quick takeaways for me are:

• Marriage has changed: we expect more out of the marriage and our mates than previous generations

• Marriage takes time: those able to spend more time on their marriage get more out of it, those who spend less get less enjoyment or end up divorced

• Marriage is unequal: those with more resources (i.e. rich) are more likely to stay together than those with less resources (i.e. poor).  

The resulting inequality marriage success rates reflect the broader inequality in our society.  The rich get richer (and stay married) while the poor get poorer (and get divorced).

What ways can we better support our marriages?  How can our livelihoods (i.e. jobs) support our spouses?  Will companies recognize that a healthy marriage makes for better (i.e. more productive) employees?

Marriage is hard work.  It is not all that is cracked up to be.  And yet don't those who choose to get married be given every opportunity and support to succeed?

I think so.

American hubris, here we go again.

In the wake of the Ukrainian uprising, there have been no shortage of Western opinions on how the U.S. should intervene or what the Ukranians should do.

Perhaps the best discussion I've heard was on my primary (and highly recommended) news source, Democracy Now!  

And perhaps the most general advice about possible American involvement in other country's affairs came at the end of this Thomas Friedman piece, "Don't Just Do Something. Sit There.":

To summarize/paraphrase Friedman:

1. We understand little of other country's complexities
2. We may be able to stop bad things from happening, but only at considerable cost
3. Trying to make good things happen replaces self-empowerment of the people

These points are powerful reminders to be cautious in finding solutions to others' problems, both as individuals and as a nation.

For the second year in a row, Emily participated in a V-day (Valentine's or Vagina, take your pick) event to celebrate women's bodies and bring attention to the abuse women suffer from around the world.

Last year we were in Ann Arbor on the Diag at the University of Michigan.  This year we were at the Kaua'i Community College of the University of Hawaii.

The choreographed dance was beautifully done, and ends with hands raised before they slowly lower and point right at you, the audience, to remind us that we all have a duty to stand up and defend women's rights.  

A powerful yet celebratory message.  You can listen to the amazing song, "Break The Chain," they danced to below.

One billion rising indeed.

Today I will do my monthly habit of re-lending money on Kiva.org. When my wife Emily and I got married, we decided our wedding gift to our guests would be not just an awesome party of dancing and celebration, but also a card that said we would be investing the money in microfinance loans through Kiva.org.

Kiva allows you to easily make loans in increments of $25 to low-income people around the world.  You get to read their profiles, look at their picture and hear about how their business is going.  It's the gift that keeps on giving, as we've now used our original gift of about $2,000 to re-lend a total of over $15,000 for a total of 157 loans since we were married over 5 years ago!  Get started today for FREE with your own loan of $25 (donated by an anonymous giver).

I highly recommend getting involved yourself.  You have the opportunity to make a real change in someone's life, and then to re-lend the money or cash out once the money is paid back.  Kiva runs on donations, so they will ask you to donate money for expenses, but it's entirely optional.

Here is a video of how some microloans are being creatively used in Uganda.  (I lived and worked in East Africa for a year; click here to read more and see pictures on my blog.)

Next week I will be in North Carolina, visiting friends from Davidson College who now live in Durham and Charlotte.  In case you have not been following the news, there are a lot of people who are angry and getting arrested in North Carolina this summer as the Republican legislature rolls back the state to pre-Jim Crow and Pre-Roe v. Wade times.  Some of the lowlights: 

• There is now NO MORE EARLY VOTING, 
• College students must now vote OFF CAMPUS
• Students may no longer have residency in order to vote (even though Supreme Court upheld student right to vote in 1979)
• GOVERNMENT ID required; however NO COLLEGE ID's ACCEPTED (even state colleges!)
• Polling places are being consolidated.  One case at Appalachian State: 9,300 students will have to drive to a polling place with 35 PARKING SPOTS when the recommended maximum number for a polling place is... wait for it... 1,500 -- THAT'S MORE THAN SIX TIMES THE RECOMMENDED MAXIMUM!  

As a person who went to college in North Carolina, I say shame, Shame, SHAME!!!  It's back to JIm Crow ever since the Supreme Court overturned the Voting Rights Act of 1965.  Will the people rise up?  Who will stop them?