Category:

Where Reason Ends and Faith Begins

7/29/2014

I was really impressed with this article in the NYT. Professor Luhrmann argues each person has a belief continuum, from what we absolutely never will believe to what we always believe (or even take for granted!). He then says we all have a "boggle threshold," where any thing beyond this point on the belief spectrum is out of mind's bounds of comprehension. Interestingly, he makes an excellent point that the more we define what we don't believe, the more we are open to possibly closer, less extreme beliefs.

Here is his conclusion, and the entire article is worth a quick read:

Gods are invisible, the future is inscrutable, and much of life is bushwhacking over uneven terrain. In the face of your own uncertainty, being precise about what you don’t believe in can shore up your confidence in what you do.

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O Muse My Fuse - Spoken Word Poetry

4/6/2014

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Here is some spoken-word poetry I wrote after being inspired by a passage in Steven Pressfield's The War of Art, and excellent kick-in-the-butt manifesto for creatives. He encourages artists to invoke a muse before beginning their creative endeavor. Listen here:

The Greeks
full of aspiration
had a source
for inspiration
a course
for perspiration

They called it the muses
and made no excuses
seeking a vocation
they made invocation

invoking the gods
provoking the odds
with a shout
they cried out:

O Muse
My Muse
Be my fuse.
Light my fire
My true desire
lest I tire
in the mire
of stuck and slow
and luck run low.

I have no clue
yet just a few...
inklings
among my...
weaklings

O muse
my fuse
give me some clues
lest I return to the booze

My muse
my fuse
MINE
to lose

Invest in me
lest I divest
from thee

now’s not the time
to nickel and dime
or count
the mount
-ing cost

for I am lost

O muse
my fuse
give me some clues
'fore I put on my shoes

O muse
my fuse
MINE
to lose

You pursue the meek --
Now rescue those you seek!

find me
lost
in the mi(d)st
of the wilderness

find me
lost
in the bliss
of a kiss

find me
lost
at all cost
find me

for with you
my muse
I cannot
lose.

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What do you want?

4/3/2014

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Yesterday I posted to Facebook about this interesting documentary about a peculiar man who retired to simply skate. Here is what I said in my post, followed by the video, courtesy of NYT after a successful Kickstarter campaign.

A different kind of retirement. Summary: "Slomo" used to be a doctor. An old man once told him to "Do what you want." As his eyesight started failing, he decided to "retire" and reinvent himself as someone who skates everyday down the San Diego boardwalk. He's perfected the art of skating slowly, tapping into the acceleration we feel as we glide on the earth's surface around the center of the earth (for an explanation, see about the 9:00 minute mark or so). He says he gets called all kinds of things, and thinks people react in different ways (mostly positive) to seeing someone doing exactly what they want to be doing. Pretty inspiring.

After accepting the advice to "do what you want to," 'SloMo' identifies the next step as figuring out what you want (let alone for now what makes you successful). As I've mentioned in a previous post, I continue to struggle with a similar about wants in life, namely Who Am I? and What is my purpose?

Emily reminded me of a therapy technique used to identify what we want. The theory behind it is that our emotions, both negative and positive, come from our core desires. Put another way, our emotions are expressions of what we want.

The exercise is relatively simple, although you will want to write some things down or have a patient partner there to listen and help trace the pattern. Here is the step-by-step process:

Start with the intense emotion you feel. Name it, whether it's sadness, anger, joy, etc.
Next, ask yourself what the emotion makes you want to do?
After naming that action, ask yourself how you would feel if you did what you wanted to do?
Keep asking yourself what emotion you are feeling and resulting action you want to make until you reach a state where you are completely content.

Think of emotions as layers of an onion. Each layer is peeled away to reveal another emotion until you reach a core state of being where you desire to be for a long time, if not forever. For most, this is complete and utter contentment, joy, peace, love or happiness.

The purpose of the exercise is to not simply uncover your core desire. It is to show you how your emotional reaction to a situation is actually in your own self-interest in getting what you want. Your core desire is just hidden in many layers. This helps in understanding your emotions and how they serve your ultimate purpose.

Try it out next time you have an intense emotion that you're not sure where it came from. What might initially appear as destructive behavior might lead to something more constructive.

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Way Too Many Sports

4/2/2014

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One thing I was concerned about coming to Kauai was being able to play team sports. Well, it turns it out is has not been much of a problem at all!

Sundays: Soccer @ 2 or 4pm in Waimea, Wailua, Kapaa or Hanalei; Frisbee @ 5pm in Hanalei or Kalaheo; Basketball @ 5:30pm in Kilauea.
Mondays: Soccer @ 6:30pm in Kapaa at the hockey rink.
Tuesdays: Soccer @ 5:00pm at Lydgate Beach Park, 6:00pm in Hanalei or 7:00pm in Kilauea.
Wednesdays: Basketball @ 6:30pm in Kilauea.
Thursdays: Frisbee @ 5:00pm at Lydgate Beach Park.
Fridays: Soccer @ 5:00pm
Saturdays: A day of rest!

I may have overdone it, however, as I didn't stretch my hamstrings well on Tuesday night, and in rainy weather I twerked, er, tweaked my lower right back muscle, possibly my interior oblique. I tried to play basketball the next night, which - surprise, surprise! - wasn't a good idea.

Looks like it'll be several days off nursing a pulled lower back before I'm back at it. Some light stretching, laying on my back with knees at 90-degree angles, ibuprofen, and as little lifting as possible!

It feels a lot like being sick...

But boy, has it been fun!

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Shedding the Should: Identity Identification

2/27/2014

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Since August 2013 when my two-year residency at First Pres Ann Arbor came to a close, I have been unemployed and working on a book about my grandfather.

I've discovered that writing is hard, and writing one's first book even is even harder. Granted, I've been traveling throughout the fall and finally landed in Kaua'i with my wife Emily. We are still trying to secure suitable housing in a place that is both incredibly beautiful AND expensive.

Not being settled or having a routine has not made the writing any easier (like the litote? Anyone, anyone?? Not even my spellcheck?!). And all the devilish thought-demons begin to emerge:

What stories have I told myself that aren't true?
Where am I "shoulding" on myself? I should be this or I should be that...
Doesn't someone need me?
Why not let other set an agenda for me? Striking out on one's own is just too hard.

So for inspiration, I have read a lot of blogs (notice: each word takes you a to different blog), not to mention a ton of eBooks and online videos.

One thing that has become apparent to me is aligning my goals in life with my identity.

Now, I have never been very good at taking on a specific identity. I identified as a "floater" in high school, unwilling to commit or see myself a part of any specific group. Later in college, a mentor had me write "Who Am I?" at the top of the page and fill it out for the next week...

I still have that page, and it is still blank:

And in case you're wondering what is on the other side:

So yeah, I struggle with Who I am and My Purpose in Life. Yet recently I've decided to make some headway in this area.

I realize that my fear of taking on any identity keeps me muddled in a mental morass of what I am suppose to do day-to-day, let alone my purpose in life.

My solution: Take on an identity moment-by-moment, hour-by-hour.

Maybe eventually I'll work my way up to a day, a week, a month... a lifetime.

But for now, in this moment, I am a blogger. Soon I will transition to being a writer and working on my book. This afternoon I will be a frisbee thrower. Tonight: a husband, a partner. When I'm cooking, I am a cook. When I'm reading, I am a reader.

Sounds simple enough. And maybe once I get used to identifying with these different hats, I will be closer to identifying with me, Evans.

Who is that guy, anyway?

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Pastoral Care: Listening is a Skill

2/2/2014

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One of my top skills on LinkedIn is "Pastoral Care."

I've always found pastoral care to be an enigma. Compared to doctors, firefighters, psychologists and others who give care to people, a pastor's care feels somehow both superficial and substantive.

I would venture to say that most spiritual things embody this conflicting traits: superficial yet substantive.

Pastoral care training is essentially about becoming a better listener.

It takes an incredible amount of attention and a lot of humility.

It is like meditating in someone else's head.

I thought about this after reading this story from the comments section of this post:

"I remember a mini-Paradigm Shift I experienced one Sunday morning on a subway in New York. People were sitting quietly -- some reading newspapers, some lost in thought, some resting with their eyes closed. It was a calm, peaceful scene. Then suddenly, a man and his children entered the subway car. The children were so loud and rambunctious that instantly the whole climate changed.

The man sat down next to me and closed his eyes, apparently oblivious to the situation. The children were yelling back and forth, throwing things, even grabbing people's papers. It was very disturbing. And yet, the man sitting next to me did nothing. It was difficult not to feel irritated. I could not believe that he could be so insensitive to let his children run wild like that and do nothing about it, taking no responsibility at all. It was easy to see that everyone else on the subway felt irritated, too.

So finally, with what I felt was unusual patience and restraint, I turned to him and said, "Sir, your children are really disturbing a lot of people. I wonder if you couldn't control them a little more?"

The man lifted his gaze as if to come to a consciousness of the situation for the first time and said softly, 'Oh, you're right. I guess I should do something about it. We just came from the hospital where their mother died about an hour ago. I don't know what to think, and I guess they don't know how to handle it either.'

Can you imagine what I felt at that moment? My paradigm shifted. Suddenly I saw things differently, I felt differently, I behaved differently. My irritation vanished. I didn't have to worry about controlling my attitude or my behavior; my heart was filled with the man's pain. Feelings of sympathy and compassion flowed freely. "Your wife just died? Oh, I'm so sorry. Can you tell me about it? What can I do to help?"

Everything changed in an instant."

When we listen with intention and care, we get out of ourselves and into another.

We enter a new world.

And our world is forever changed.

May you listen today with all of our mind, all of your heart, all of your soul, and all of your strength.

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Changing Lives thru Kiva.org

9/18/2013

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Today I will do my monthly habit of re-lending money on Kiva.org. When my wife Emily and I got married, we decided our wedding gift to our guests would be not just an awesome party of dancing and celebration, but also a card that said we would be investing the money in microfinance loans through Kiva.org.

Kiva allows you to easily make loans in increments of $25 to low-income people around the world. You get to read their profiles, look at their picture and hear about how their business is going. It's the gift that keeps on giving, as we've now used our original gift of about $2,000 to re-lend a total of over $15,000 for a total of 157 loans since we were married over 5 years ago! Get started today for FREE with your own loan of $25 (donated by an anonymous giver).

I highly recommend getting involved yourself. You have the opportunity to make a real change in someone's life, and then to re-lend the money or cash out once the money is paid back. Kiva runs on donations, so they will ask you to donate money for expenses, but it's entirely optional.

Here is a video of how some microloans are being creatively used in Uganda. (I lived and worked in East Africa for a year; click here to read more and see pictures on my blog.)

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Where Reason Ends and Faith Begins

O Muse My Fuse - Spoken Word Poetry

What do you want?

Way Too Many Sports

Shedding the Should: Identity Identification

Pastoral Care: Listening is a Skill

Changing Lives thru Kiva.org

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